This specific enhancement is about a tool in my coaching system called Fear-Benefit-Now.
Consider the fear you have. If it’s fear of rejection, or failure, or success, or if you have to be amazing and you feel you are not, for the most part they are hardly ever the real fear. Ego fears can be tricky, they are illusions, they are camouflaged. 90% of the time, the fear you think you have is not the actual fear. The real fear is going to have a different spin and a different feel to it. It may be close, but it won’t actually be it.
The fear that is really driving you is something you have to connect to on a deeper level. For example:
Imagine a person that got angry with everything they did. Maybe their first couple of marriages were unsuccessful, or they are a successful business leader and got fired from a couple of jobs. Everybody keeps telling them they have to get rid of the anger, so they go through traditional anger management and counseling. If all of a sudden they let go of this angry pattern and were going to be calm and serene, how is it going to affect them? It’s not a fear of failing at doing that new pattern, or that they can’t do it. But how can they be successful when anger has been their rocket fuel for accomplishment? They intellectually know anger is toxic, but they also know at a deeper, unconscious level that anger is what they use to create success.
They don’t know what a calm, serene, and joyful person does to create success. They can’t see it, feel it, or hear it, and it’s not in their body. They may be able to intellectualize it a little and practice it. But if they manage to incorporate calmness into their life what will happen when something intense happens? They will go back to what they know, what they are used to, being angry. How can they succeed in life without anger? That is the real fear. Ask an angry person that and 9 out of 10 times they will look at you with a blank face, they won’t know the answer.
When you find these programs that are running and pull them out of your life, the way reality is being created changes at a very high level. Your ability to create success now lies in another arena.
The fight that they are having about whether to get rid of anger or not completely changes when they find the deeper program that is running. It doesn’t take years of therapy, or months and months of anger management, you are not dealing with the right problem.
In about 2-3% of client work that I do, we need to go to the past to figure out the problem. You do not have to go back to figure out what pattern or program you are running today. The fact that they might have came from trauma or dysfunctional pasts doesn’t necessarily matter, they don’t have to go back. More than 90% of clients choose not to go back and relive something that created pain for them years ago. They will use language that they are healed now and they have accepted the trauma. They may feel good about the past and are completely healed, but the program that they learned that Is creating reality for them is still running. They don’t focus on how they can create different results by running different programs and patterns. Nobody has shown them how to create reality that way.
Most people will try to get rid of the fear by pushing it away and denying it. That only increases the anger and intensifies the pattern because the more you resist something, the more it pushes back and appears in your life. When the fear comes you can fall in love with it and release it. Whether you know where it came from or not, release it, let It go. If you are embracing fear and falling in love with it, you get love. When you think about where the fear came from you will have a lot more open-mindedness and consciousness, and you can feel it differently and recreate the moment and what the fear means.
Acknowledge your fear and really look at what benefit you are getting by having this fear. When you are conscious of why the fear exists, it will be far easier for you to make the choice to face the fear to make the change you want to make now. This will greatly enhance your outcomes when using the power of the Law of Attraction.